Unpacking the closet - In your dreams by Jane Teresa Anderson

Sometimes the most profound revelations emerge from the simplest gestures.

“I’ve never had so many colourful clothes”, Petra laughed, hands waving about expansively as she met my gaze over Zoom, “in real life or in dreams!”

“How did you feel about that in the dream?” I asked.

“Complete. Fulfilled. Excited. Like I had everything I would ever need. What does that say about me? That I’m superficial and shallow? That it’s all about how I look?”

“It’s a dream,” I reminded her, “nothing is as it seems. As I was listening to you telling me about your dream, I noticed your hands kept wavering over your chest then you would open your palms and extend them towards me as if you were making an offering.”

Petra’s eyebrows shot up. “Really?”

I mimicked the gesture back to her. “What does my body language suggest to you?” I asked.

Petra cocked her head to one side, considered.

“Before you answer, copy the gesture,” I suggested.

I remember the early days of doing dream consultations by phone, before Skype, before Zoom. I am an astute listener, able to read between the lines, or – perhaps that should be – listen between the words. When Skype entered the picture, I was fascinated to watch as people described their dreams – their faces, shoulders, hands signalling unconscious connections to their dream material. And now we’re so accustomed to Zoom that although we are in different rooms, and often on opposite sides of the world, we sit together in the same space.

My work, as a dream analyst and dream therapist, is to hold that space for my clients while I listen, ask them questions, help them explore, gently point out connections, guide them towards a deeper understanding of their unconscious mind, reveal the wisdom held within each dream, offer dream alchemy (to reprogram the unconscious mind) where needed, and shine new light on their life. Which brings me back to Petra.

Petra repeated the gesture. “How does it make you feel?” I asked.

“This bit, waving my hands in front of my chest, feels like summoning something up from my heart. It feels warm, like all this stuff is being freed up, kind of emanating from me. And this bit, opening my palms to you, feels like I want to share the feeling with you.”

Seconds tick by while Petra absorbs her own words.

“It’s not about clothes at all, is it?” she says. “It’s about … you know what it’s about? It’s about opening myself up to a more heartfelt way of living in the world. It’s about showing up in a more colourful way, not in more colourful clothes, but in a more expressive way, drawing on some of my – oh here we go – some of my more colourful experiences that I have kept a bit – oh here we go again – a bit close to my chest.”

She sniffed, grabbed a tissue, dabbed at a tear or two.

“How do you do that?” she asked. “How do you get me to the point where the answers I’m looking for come out of my own mouth?”

“Well,” I began, “partly I know what questions to ask, based on my understanding of your dream and from listening and watching between the lines. And there’s always a special magic that occurs when we spend time immersed in exploring a dream, and it’s this: your unconscious mind joins in the conversation and offers clues. Like your hands waving about in the way they did. Your unconscious mind creates the language of your dreams, so when you and I are in that space, revisiting a dream, it’s open, listening in too, contributing. It offers memories, connections. You become more conscious of what was, until we spoke, unconscious.”

“So if you’re ready to draw on some of your more colourful experiences,” I continued, “what does that say about how you were expressing yourself before today?”

“Pretty black and white,” Petra said, “a thing is either this or that, head stuff, you know.”

“What kind of garments did you notice in your dream closet, Petra?”

“Tops, bodices, shirts, jackets … I don’t remember seeing dresses, pants, hats, shoes.”

“Things that draw attention to the heart then,” I say.

This story is inspired by recent dream consultations with several different clients: all details and dream symbols changed to maintain confidentiality. I hope it has given you more insight into the way I work with clients, and into the way a client’s unconscious mind will frequently contribute at such a rich level. While I usually enter a dream consultation with a clear understanding of the dream’s meaning, my task is to offer you a safe space, walk through your dream with you, and support you as we gently unpack the wisdom at the heart of your dream.

What symbols from your own dreams might be waiting to reveal their deeper wisdom?