It was a warm, sunny day on Sunrise Drive, and I was sitting on my little swing in my backyard. The sun lit up my small, round face and the cool autumn breeze hugged me close. I watched the orange and red leaves sway their way to the grass and delicately land.
The blue sky was as naive as my mind, and the white clouds symbolized where my mind drifted off. It was certainly a beautiful day, as the cardinal birds flapped their little wings and flew to my tree.
There was something about these cardinals that galvanized me. They’re so divine and sweet, as if they come from heaven. Not a pang of sorrow ever reaches them, and they live in pure bliss for eternity. For that reason, I wanted to listen to them more.
“Sing more. Sing again,” I told the red bird with a mohawk hairstyle that stared at me.
I heard our patio door being opened. It was my Nana, and she was coming to join me.
“Nana!” I shouted. “Come here, they’re here!” I fidgeted and jumped out of my swing to grab her arm.
“Coming, coming, my darling,” she responded in a singsong voice.
“They’re singing again, can you hear them?” I asked her.
We both became silent so we could hear the birds sing. It sounded like honey melting into our ears, and our hearts were leaping with joy. We sat on the swing and let it take us backward and forward.
We let our feet drift up in the air as the swing went forward, and we both smiled. My grandmother gave me a thumbs-up as she sang “Someday I feel like falling on the ground.” In response to her song, my laughter chortled like a bell. My grandmother, who had a sense of humour and was filled with so much positivity, always brightened my day.
“You’re a great lady!” she exclaimed.
“Thank you, Nana. You are, too,” I said.
Suddenly, as I looked at my grandmother’s smile, I saw the pain in her eyes, which were looking wet and moist. At the same time, the colour in her face seemed to disappear, even though she was smiling at me. She seemed pale and frail, like a doll.
“Nana, are you OK?” I asked her.
I touched my grandmother gently on her arm and checked her forehead with my palms. It was warm. Was she feeling sick?
“Nana, let’s go inside. You don’t look so well,” I told her.
“No, no. I’m doing fine by the grace of God,” she replied.
“Nana?” I asked.
I tried to hold her hand and reach out to her, but she vanished away like a puff of smoke. As I looked around me, all the happiness that had existed that day faded away. The birds stopped singing, and the sun hid behind a cloud as the cloud sent cool winds that brought goosebumps to my skin. A black cat stared at me from a distance.
My Nana always knew how to brighten up the day. Where is the light, if she’s gone?
“Nana? Where are you?” I panicked. I felt my heart beating loudly in my chest, and it started to beat faster and faster. I took a deep breath and then let it go.
I remembered her last words.
I’m doing fine by the grace of God.
Ineffable: The return of beauty
I stared at the tree again. I kept on blinking my tears away until I could see the sun making its way out of the clouds, and then I spotted a cardinal flying to the tree once more. A youthful spirit brushed past my hair, and the sun warmed up my cold veins. I patiently waited for the bird to sing.
I miss you, Nana, I thought.
The bird started to sing a song that was enriching and promising. It was as pure as the golden rays of sunlight shining from the sky and as sweet as the kind words my Nana would always speak to me. The cardinal must be a beautiful soul that has come to see me, I thought to myself.
Right when this bird started to sing again, all my grief dissolved like salt in water. All
my pain turned into a treasure trove of precious stones.
“Sing more. Sing again,” I told the bird, and smiled because I knew this cordial spirit from somewhere.
“Ineffable,” I whispered.
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image: Briam-Cute (Cropped from original)
